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The good news is, you now have a clear vision of your relationship, and the renewed motivation to give it a shot. I guess your line in your OP, saying you could easily yourself settle down with him, told me that you do care about this guy. The flip side of the coin is that you have to live this relationship on a day-to-day basis before you know the real "him". He shed all his neediness once you guys are together. Or he not. Proof is in the pudding. Until then, take it one day at a time and enjoy what it offers if big IF you feel you don't have to give up or compromise too much for your own good. If it works out, great. If it doesn't, don't beat yourself up over it too much. Sphynx's reply to my own post yeaterday. She was right on the money. Can I also give you a sisterly piece of advice for your consideration? You sound very analytical and intellectually driven, a very-much-in-charge kind of girl. I wouldn't be surprised if you were in science or law or something along those lines where you need to reason and argument for a living. But sometimes you need to let your heart speak as loud, if not louder, as your. A dear older friend who I value very much and who is in the happiest 30+ year marriage that I know, told me this the other day: = ego, heart = real you. It's important to listen to both but equally important not to drown out what the heart says. I gave that a very good thought and then applied it to my own current relationship, and it has made all the difference I could have dreamed of. Good luck to you, him, and the two of you, Cardi.

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